Friday, April 15, 2005

Taxman, Chelsea, and Billy Zabka 

Wow. Don't post for a day and the emails start streaming. Yes, I'm alive. No, I'm not going through liver failure (that I know of). In reality, I’ve been battling work and the tax man at the same time.

It’s not that easy to find a way to right off the bar expenses. I should be able to. Maybe if I found a way to make some money from this crappy blog, I could write the bar tabs off as a work expense. Hhmmm

I also wanted to list my liver as a dependent but if I do that, he’ll probably turn me in for neglect.

Plus, I haven’t really had much to write about. I’ve made a few hit and runs at the bar, but nothing spectacular. Maybe Landow caught something interesting on the camera last night but I didn’t see anything thrilling or worthy of wasting your precious blog reading time.

Besides that, it looks like my readership has dropped below the Mendoza line.

How ‘bout some random junk


Chelsea vs Liverpool in the Champions League semi-finals.
AlCantHang vs Obituarium
Al vs Joe

We have a week to come up with a proper bet. Maybe go the DoubleAs route and allow the winner to rename the other’s blog for a month.

Maybe do a double-or-nothing bet with the bottle of booze I earned from the LAST Liverpool loss to Chelsea.

Maybe the loser has to abstain from drinking the entire Vegas trip. Ok, nevermind. That one is just silly.

So Joe, you come up with an idea for a wager and I’m game. Except for that whole face painting thing. I’ll have to pass on that one.

Luckily for me, I'll be sitting in a bar in Key West during the first leg and will be properly drunk and dressed in blue. Joe, take the day off and we'll pound dial-a-shots all day?

Along the same soccer theme, I can’t wait to see what kind of punishment UEFA comes up with after the crap display from Inter Milan. Kick ‘em out, that’s what I say. The whole damned country.

And kick the racist Spaniards out for a year too while they’re at it.

For Pinky, not sure if he remembers from the AC Trip, but here’s my favorite ‘soccer’ website. Football365.com I especially enjoy John Nicholson's articles.


For those looking for help filling out there Pick-A-Pope bracket pool, here's a little inside information from the the Irish bookmakers.

I'm still going with Duke to make the finals.


Anyone catch the monster, kick him in the junk, suckout SirWiffleBall performed on the PokerGeek last night. Brutal. Just to make Chris feel even better, I threw the hand details into Pokersavy's Bad Beat-o-meter.

Soul Crushing.


What happens when geeks go wild....

Jeremy Stribling said on Thursday that he and two fellow MIT graduate students questioned the standards of some academic conferences, so they wrote a computer program to generate research papers complete with nonsensical text, charts and diagrams.

The trio submitted two of the randomly assembled papers to the World Multiconference on Systemics, Cybernetics and Informatics (WMSCI), scheduled to be held July 10-13 in Orlando, Florida.

To their surprise, one of the papers -- "Rooter: A Methodology for the Typical Unification of Access Points and Redundancy" -- was accepted for presentation.
Oh god.

Hold me back.

I can't stop laughing.


Effing dorks.


That might be the first time I've used or heard the term "dork" since High School. When it was most often directed at me.



Apparently someone has been having fun uploading stuff to my image gallery. Check it out.

Here's my favorite, Rockin' a Sweet Mullet. Just for Felicia.


With the NFL Draft coming up, I want to link up two of my favorite posts from MeanGene. Part1 and Part2. Last year he made an attempt to actually make it to see the draft live and in person.

Didn't quite work out that way but they were great posts.


That's enough rambling for now. I'll leave you with me song of the day. This song came to me for a couple of reason.

Last week I was playing at a Full Tilt Poker tourney with Billy Zabka. Unfortunately it wasn't the real Billy Zabka but it was some funny chat.

"Sweep the leg! You have a problem with that Mr. Lawrence?"

"Get him a body bag...YEAAHHH!!!"

Also, this song featured prominently in a recent SouthPark episode.

Here ya go. Enjoy.

Cheers, have a good weekend.


Wednesday, April 13, 2005

Don't Shoot the Cat..... or the player 

If there ever was a day a work day where I deserved to find myself at the bottom of a bottle by sundown, today is THAT day.

Just some quick notes.


Chelsea advanced to the final four in the Champions League last night. Today I'll set back and hope for Liverpool to advance as well. Hopefully (and it's a big question mark) tonight's match won't be as ugly as Inter Milan / AC Milan match.

That match featured dozens of flares thrown onto the field and the match was never completed. Apparently they don't check for flares as you enter the building. But reading the stories I was amazed by this line concerning the history of problems with Inter Milan.

"Inter also had a domestic stadium ban imposed by Serie A officials three years ago after 'ultras' hurled a scooter from the second tier of the San Siro."
Hurled a scooter from the upper level.

Read again.


I don't ever want to hear another damned thing about fans from Philadelpia. Ever.


Since I can't leave to watch the Liverpool match, I'm stuck with ESPN's Live Commentary. Even before kickoff....

"Already there's a cauldron-like atmosphere - bottles being thrown by fans of both sides - the police in the middle. Scenes, sadly, to be expected."


On a happier note, the ScubaSteve research department has provided me with the perfect tent to take down to Scott's shindig this summer.

The world's first inflatable pub!

BG also said he'd like to see Mrs. CantHang dressed in this, and myself wearing this. We'll see.


I'm sure everyone has seen the story. StB hasn't commented but he probably just doesn't care.

Wisconsin Hunters vote on Shooting Feral Cats.

Now for the record, I am a god person not a cat person. I did inherit a cat with the wifey and we've come to an understanding. I pretend to like him, he promises not to piss on any of my stuff anymore.

But some of the things coming out are just too funny. Starting with the webiste Don't Shoot the Cat. In their words.... "A non-violent campaign of WisconsinCAT Coordinating resistance to Question 62"

This website contains all sorts of the links detailing the horrible thing those nasty hunters want to do. Capping off with a link stating the Pope John Paul II was on their side.

I was getting a chuckle out of all this yesterday when I get pinged and something pops into my inbox. I will protect the sender but it almost got an honest to god spit take.

Here ya go.


I really don't have anything to top that. Go read a good blog for once, slacker.


Tuesday, April 12, 2005

"He had to cut the wind with his balls, which is something we had to see."

Mike Nolan, San Fran 49ers head coach, quoted by Peter King
....and taken completely out of context but it had to be done.


I'm hesitant to post about this but because I'm not sure if it's sketchy or not but....

There's a new poker site out there. ScurvyDog wrote about it yesterday (and I read it earlier on a new blog by Asia). I've been considering checking it out and gave it a shot.

GamesGrid.com Their big selling point? 1000% bonus. Deposit $500 and get $5,000 in bonus. I'm not a big bonus chaser so I'll leave it up to everyone else to tell me whether it's a good deal or not with the bonus requirements.

I'd love to tell you how the games are but I'm still waiting for the account activation.

If you sign up, feel free to use AlCantHang as your referral.


Not much else going on recently except trying to make the tax man happy.

If you get a chance, stop by Up For Poker and give happy thoughts to CJ and his new nephew for a quick recovery.



p.s. I just did a google image search on 'poker'. Look who I found.


Monday, April 11, 2005

The short weekend review 

It was a standard weekend. Booze, poker, keg stands, and empty soco bottles. That's about it.

Have a good week


Wait, you want more details?

Friday started off innocently enough. A few cocktails until the sunset and then back home. I found out that quite a few bloggers were going to play in the PokerStars O8 tourney with a whopping $1 buyin. Drunk or not, I'm in for that level of play.

Not only does my drunk ass not drop out early, and I didn't even bubble out. 904 players started and I finished 32nd. For a killer $2.61 profit.

Come on baby! We're going to Sizzlers!

At the same time, I was two tabling Survydog's O8 tourney on Noble where I crashed out in 10th. And there were only 12 players. But I was getting involved with some big hands on the Stars and had to make a commitment to one of them.


Saturday was a nice mellow day. We ended up at our friend Becky's house for some relaxing with beer on the deck (and the nectar of the gods).

Relaxing my ass. Shortly after sunset, and I AM noticing a theme, the Soco bottle was empty, serious-full-contact speed quarters, and Eva did her very first keg stand.

Then her second. (btw, there are pics available of this but I don't have them yet)

I am defintely too old for this stuff.


Sunday was just sitting around watching movies with the wifey. 13 going on 30, Jennifer Garner is nice but what an abortion of a movie. Then VanHelsing. Not as horrible as expected but good lord did Kate Beckinsale look great.

While this was going on, I sweated three bloggers in three different tourneys and all three made the money. Felicia and Joanne both made it into the money but the BoyGenius was the big winner of the night. Turning a PartyPoker FPP freeroll with 1500+ players into $350 when he finished 5th. Great job and he had a lot of sweaters along with him.

Man, you should have seen the monkey players go all-in crazy after they made the money.


If you haven't seen it yet, Iggy is throwing an online satellite for a seat in the $1500 NLHE WSoP Event occurring during the June Blogger get together.

Check his site for details. Unfortunately I will be missing this one because I'll be too wasted down in Margaritaville.


BG has another article published on PokerPlayerNewspaper.com. This one tells one of the stories from our trip to the Bahamas to surprise Otis during his first PokerStars gig.

Good story.

G-Rob, did you know we were BG's road dogs? Nice.


Saturday night I DVR'd the Headbanger's Ball on MTV2. I thought the original Anthrax lineup was supposed to be on but I must have mixed up my dates. Sunday morning I sat down to watch it. God what a mess. I miss the original.

I'm going to sit down and do a review tonight. I was that bad it deserves my full attention.

Until then, how 'bout some ol' Headbanger's Ball material. I'm sending this one to Gracie's friend (can't recall his name from friday night) and BadBlood.

S.O.D - Chromatic Death


Finally, the perfect gift for the Party monkeys fish who keep sucking out, hitting their miracle one outters, praising their own idiotic plays, and just generally sucking ass.