Friday, March 04, 2005


A serious question that needs answering.

Can you ever have too much cowbell? More Cowbell!

This is where my warped mind went this morning. Listening to the radio, Def Leppard's Photograph comes on. During one part, you get some serious cowbell. Not bad.

But then.... Mountain - Mississippi Queen comes on. Now there's so good cowbellin' I'll tell you.

So I started to think of other monster cowbell songs. And it hit me. King of Cowbell.

Nazareth - Hair of the Dog

Cowbelling reached it's peak with this song and has never been the same. Here's my job for you, my dedicated reader. Leave a comment with the best cowbell songs. Maybe I'll even compile it on CD.

K-Tel Records present, The Best of Cowbell. Well all be hundred-aires.


See, warped I tell you.

A couple straight days of getting back to the booze, throw in some late night work, and now the brain is fuctioning improperly.

Not much done last night. Pauly and I sweated as Joanne attempted to make the Canadian World Cup Team. She was doing well, and playing well, but didn't make the team.

Also, I believe Pauly and I talked her into coming to Vegas. Hang out with proper boozers.


Attention all east coast bloggers, Pinky from Fish-n-Chips will be making the journey across the pond later this month. It looks like we'll be meeting up at The Borgata the first weekend of April.

Let me know if you're interested in getting together for some poker goodness.


Heading out tonight for booze and bands. Possibly a rare weekend post tomorrow.



Thursday, March 03, 2005

Welcome back my friend..... 

"So I've sworn off the 25NL blogger tables. And my bankroll has thanked me."
AlCantHang. Yesterday
What an assmonkey I am.

Grubby was there, I was drunk, I thought he had The Hammer.

We will never speak of it again. It never happened.


aaaaahh. My sweet sweet friend is back.

I've missed him. StB knows him. A certain uber-posting cyber-dwarf definitely knows him.

That feeling of accomplishment that can only be obtained from a solid 8 hour binge. Waking up and the first thing that pops into your head is "oh man, the cat shit in my mouth. again." It feels like a 400 pound thing is sitting on your chest because the night before you personally smoked enough to pay for Phillip Morris' legal bills.

But it was all in the name of hanging with old friends I hadn't seen in awhile. Kevin the Original MonkeyBoy and Blair, who should be in the Bartender Hall of Fame. If there is such a thing.

I'd only seen Blair a couple of times at the bar in the new year and was shocked and startled to find out he's engaged. This is a crime against all that is good and holy in the world.

Blair could tell some good stories. Nothing printable and all filthy. Boathouse Bob stops by here occasionally, he could tell you.

Before you know it, chairs are getting stacked, patrons booted, and tabs paid. Another bar closed. And when you can feel the pulse in your eyeballs again, you know something good was accomplished.


Mr. R Deckard left a comment last week:
Speaking about poker hotties. . .
How about a pic or two of the Grubette?
If you (and, it seems, every
other male opponent) get the insta-crush on her, well, I'm sure that just makes
us *all* quite curious. . .
I'm too embarrassed to ask Grub/Grubette
directly, though.

Now before we go any further and I post her picture, I must warn everyone. Any unhealthy comments towards the Grubette will be dealt with by BadBlood aka Gunz.

So here you have it. Only the second picture ever posted of one of my favorite booze-swilling, poker-playing, female bloggers. And it came straight from her.



Today for the "AlCantHang look what I found in my desk song of the day", I've got two. One short funny one from Blink182. The next for the brothers BG and Bob plus ChiefBigToke.



That's it for today. I need to order my hangover special for the office.

Extra large, extra cheese, garlic, and onion pizza.

hehe. Everyone will stay away from me now.


Wednesday, March 02, 2005

Congratulations Troy Brown!

You took the hit in you wallet to be a good team player. You never made your bonus incentives but you helped your team out by playing offense and defense. Now they can use the "Dynasty" word.

Thanks for being a team player. Now here's the door. Why don't you play hide and go fook yourself.


Blogging soundtrack today.... Megadeth - Countdown to Extinction. By the by, that directory in my gallery is open to uploads if anybody has anything interesting. The upload button is in the top right corner.


Some weird thoughts have to been hovering in my periphery (is that a word?) and I'm not sure how to actually put them in writing.

How many of us (blogger/readers) are winners online in the technical sense? Do you see those nasty little bugger parenthesis around your winrate in PokerTracker? I've got to think that the inherent anonymity of the internet might make it a little easier to tweak the bottom line for perception. Other than some of the top respected bloggers who I know are winning consistently, it would be interesting to do a little soul searching.

Well I'm here to tell you (standing up behind the podium). Hi, my name is Al. I am a losing poker player.

Maybe you thought it was self-deprecating humor when I'd say I suck. But it's the truth. The quote from Felicia after the Vegas outting. I wanted to make sure I hadn't embarrassed myself with my play at Sam's Town and I thought I played pretty well in making the final 10.

"You didn't embarrass yourself. You're not any good. But nothing embarrassing."


Since then I've made the concentrated effort to improve my game. Doesn't that give me a head start on the rest? I've taken my head out of the sand. It's easy enough to read the books and research, but something completely different to apply it in real life.

I can sit at a table and rip off the EV, pot odds, implied odds, outs, etc. but does it matter if I don't apply them correctly?

Now don't get me wrong, I haven't dropped thousands of dollars. Not even hundreds of dollars. According to PT, I'm one good session from ridding myself of those pesky parenthesis but that's not the point.

My goal is to be a solid, well-rounded poker player. I'm never going to be in the company with the big names. But I can be a solid player.

From Ray Zee's book, High Low Split Poker:
"One of the interesting things about low limit O8 is that a poor player can go for long periods of time before he realizes how badly he plays. this is because poor players are often in the pot with other poor players, and they end pushing their chips back and forth. If one of them runs good for awhile, he may think he is an expert. Eventually, however, he will become a loser."

I don't know if that doesn't apply to low-limit Party Hold'em also.

I refuse to be that guy. I've started to expand my game selection. I've played more O8 and Razz hands in 2005 than hold'em. I'm reading as much as I can and actually applying to my game. I'm throwing questions at those who know much better.

And I've damn skippy stopped playing the monstrously huge -EV blogger 25NL table.

Just a little history reminder. Those 'blogger' gatherings once began on the .50/1 LIMIT tables. You could sit down with your stack and not worry about busting on one hand when someone makes a move. It was about the fun, interesting conversation, etc. It was a good chance to get away from the grind and have a little 'no harm' fun with peers.

So I've sworn off the 25NL blogger tables. And my bankroll has thanked me.

Keep working. Keep analyzing. Keep asking questions. Keep improving.

Those are my goals.

Thus endeth my whining. I'm sure someone could have send it better....


Don't know where the heck that came from. Crazy. I'm not even going to proof it because I don't want to re-read it.

How 'bout some classic metal? First metal band to hit number 1.


I blame all this on the wifey. I've gone nearly a week without seeing the inside of a bar. My body is built to sit on a barstool. My 'guns' are built to lift a rocks glass in the most efficient manner.

So tonight I will get myself to a proper liquor slinging venue and attempt to smoke and drink myself just a touch closer to the heavenly gates.


Shelley at HellaHold'em just keeps continuing to impress. From yesterday's comments....

"Anthrax rules. Except screw that John Bush guy. Blah. All hail Joey, Charlie, Scott, Danny, and Frankie!"



And finally....

again proving that monkeys are just funny.



Tuesday, March 01, 2005



Random junk just rolling through my head and now you have to deal with it.


First, a public service announcement.

A good sign that you've been reading waaaay too many poker blogs. When you start reading your company email, which often contains inane acronyms, and you find yourself trying to deciphyer the acronym in poker terms.

I got a company email containing "PLM" in the subject and main text. Immediately my brain says, "Pot limit what?".

This isn't the first time I've done it but it's starting to give me a pause.


Currently I have 210 blogs registered with bloglines.com Good freaking lord. Yous are crazy.


Wil Wheaton owes me a quarter for having a relative of the trademarked MonkeyBoy with him during the taping of the Hollywood Homegame.

I'll just take it from PokerGeek.


BadBlood finished in the money in another tourney. This one on FullTilt playing Razz. I sure hope this hot streak is done by the time we hit Vegas.

And for the secret to his recent online success since Saturday......

Anthrax - Medusa.

Turn up the speakers, set to repeat, play tournament. Sure fire.

Or maybe it was my crap song of the month?


For those who care, Pantera - Vulgar Display of Power is my blog writing musis the moment.


Thanks to Bob and Sean dumping their chips last night on the blogger table, apparently Sir Wiggle Waggle WiffleBall is now going to be strictly a NL specialist. Look out Doyle and Daniel.


NOT SAFE FOR WORK! (or those offended by nudity) Kind of poker related. Thanks to whoever uploaded that into my Image gallery.


Not much going on.

Cheers. Have a good day.


Monday, February 28, 2005

Snow Blows 

This day just sucks all kinds of donkey ass.

We're getting dumped on with snow, they shut down our office at 2pm, but I'm stuck here because I'm "essential". bah. Not much blogger activity to read and my PokerTracker guide is sitting on my machine at home. double bah.

Here's two videos from pokerroom.com sent to me from the Scuba Steve research branch. Pretty funny.

Video 1
Video 2

Here's a repeat but well worth. Goddess of Poker.

Finally, I think this is why the perverts are hitting my page for Lindsay Lohan.

bah. eff the snow.


O8 weekend marathon 

Starting things off, I'm happy to say that I was Customer Numero Uno. Check out HDub and Iggy for details on the new PokerTracker Guide. 64 pages of PokerTracker, number analyzing, game improving, juicy information.

Now I'm just waiting on the PokerTracker Omaha Guide. Lil help guys?


I can't believe I actually have to write this, but this post will contain nothing but poker (gasp). Of the entire weekend, only 3 or 4 hours were actually spent in a bar.

Now before you go running off selling your Southern Comfort stock, much Soco was consumed. Just not in a bar. With girlies.

Stat #1 of the weekend. 509 minutes. According to PokerTrackerOmaha, I played on one table for 509 minutes.

First hand dealt....

Omaha Hi/Lo - Saturday, February 26, 18:10:10 EDT 2005 Table 10786 (Real Money)

Last hand dealt....

Omaha Hi/Lo - Sunday, February 27, 02:41:00 EDT 2005 Table 10786 (Real Money)

Now I'm a self professed idiot, and certainly no expert, but I've gotta think that 8.5 hours at the same table cannot be good for the bottom line. But there were two fish on the table that made it impossible to walk away from the table as long as they were there (I'll post the stats later).

After all that time, I took a hit but I put the blame on myself.

The things which made the tables fishy (reload bonus) also make the bad beats escalate. Not to mention losing a good chunk on the 4th hand when someone pulled a "Bob" on me by crushing my big boat with a tiny quad.

During my marathon run at the table, many readers and bloggers made the swing between the O8 table and the blogger 25NL table running at the same time.

Mourn from BadBeatBlog. Jagershot. Jason from StickandMove. Plus the regular group of drunken misfits. G-Rob, BadBlood, -EV, BG, Bob, etc. I'm sure I'm missing a ton but who wants to manually go through a 1Meg hand history file.

Off to bed at 3am for a short 'night' sleep before joing BadBlood on Full Tilt for the morning O8 tourney.


Further Confessions of a Dangerous Fish.

I'm loving O8 but have only played the ring games. Never played a multi or SnG in my life.

So why not play a multi on FullTilt with zero experience? Gotta start somewhere.

I'm not much for posting hands and details but here's the short and simple.

Only 30 players signed up so basically it was like a 3 table SnG. BadBlood was to my right for the entire tournament. I was getting shortstacked after a couple of beats but eventually caught two consecutive hands to move me pretty high up the leader board. At one point, BB and I were the two big stacks at the table and started picking on the smaller guys.

Next thing you know, BadBlood and I are looking at new backgrounds for out table because we've made the final table.

Yahoo, 30 players, get over yourself.

You still had to make the top 4 to get paid. I had managed to get myself back towards the bottom of the chip count when for three straight hands, in position, I was dealt big pocket pairs with good low cards. All three times I hit my flop and moved quickly towards the top.

Then sat back and waited. Not because I was trying to fold into the money but because I was getting medicore starting cards out of position and horrendous cards with position. A couple of shortstacks dropped out, then BadBlood bubbled, and all of sudden I was in the money.

Making a too long story short. I ended up in a head's up battle for the win. The chip lead switched back and forth a couple of times. It eventually came down to me finishing second when we both flopped trip Kings but my opponent paired his low card.

So there ya have it. For my entire O8 tournament career, I'm ITM 100% of the time, and my average finish place is 2nd.

Thank you very much.

Thanks to Otis and BadBlood for sweating me. O8 heads up is a very strange creature.


Later that day consisted of another long session at the tables after tracking some of the tagged fish from the night before. I got beat up early but the bonus whores gave back some so that I finished well for the night.

My BB/100 hands took quite a hit this weekend but I blame my hard head for not telling me to get up after, oh I don't know, 4 hours.?. Is that too much to ask?


Man, I have GOT to get back to the bar. Too much poker content, not enough booze, girls, booze, drunk stories for my taste. If I don't watch out, this might turn into the most boring actual Poker Blog.


My link of the day. I can't believe I've missed out on some of the podcasts from the LordAdmiral Card Club. PokerProf has been doing some call-ins for the show. They highlight the going's on around the poker world and the blogging world. A couple of weeks ago they even mentioned that idiot who put up a $3 eBay auction.

Check them out, this week they talk about Halverson.


Joe owes me some Soco. Ugly, but I'll take it.


Finally, congrats to BadBlood for finishing 4th in the $50 NLHE Multi on FullTilt Saturday morning. A brutal 2 outter ended his day but he picked up a nice payday.