Friday, October 29, 2004

TwentyTwentyTwentyFour Hours to go....... 

"Oh, he's very popular Ed. The sportos, the motorheads, geeks, sluts, bloods, waistoids, dweebies, dickheads -- they all adore him. They think he's a righteous dude."
Here I go. Last post until next weekend. It'll probably be shite, but hey, you get whatcha pay for.

If I manage to come back with any semblance of a brain, and I have all 4 of my readers still around, I'll have a day by day post from the trip to St. Martin.

The plan is to do nothing but sit poolside for 7 days, attempt to break every possible drinking record known to man, maybe play some poker (a pretty good shot of playing poker since I'm dragging down 500 chips), and relax. Relaxation is the key.

Here's a question for you, my loyal readers. Or maybe we'll make it a contest. Myself and BigMike are taking down 4 (four) bottle of Southern Comfort. We get land in St.Martin 2pm on Saturday. What day will we finish off the last bottle?


I apologize for the lack of posts recently and what I did write wasn't up to my fine journalistic standard. (cough cough)

Nothing spectacular has been going on worthy of bloggerdome and preparations have been taking a good part of my energy.

But yesterday energized me. I won't post the idiots URL, but some moron made the mistake of not only flaming the Good Doctor, but also his readers. I'm a reader and I kind of took exception to it.

So I got in a nice flame war with all 3 of his readers who were just too easy to make fun of on his site. Actually, the Boy Genius and Pauly's friend Jess had some great comments. I might have to go find them and put them up here later. Great stuff.



I'm going to try and get back to pimping some of the new blogs out there. Actually, these are really that new, I just haven't given the proper pimpage.

Helixx is a blogger in my local area. He joined us at the Borgata when we did the blogger meet and greet in September. He can also be seen taking my money at Party Poker occasionally. Great posts but he tends to ask the wrong people for poker advice.

(Hand up)

Remember and repeat often. Al is a drunk, not a proper poker player! Al is a drunk, not a proper poker player!

oof. I can think of 24,845 other bloggers who could give better advice.

Also on the subject of advice.....

TheFilmGeek is an aspiring film maker out in LA LA land California (how do you write California in a Schwarzeneger accent?). I've watched him make the move from $2 SnG's on UB up to the $10 SnG's on Party and doing very well. Hopefully we'll be catching up in person during the Vegas trip in December.

Paul Phillips is an up-and-coming poker player. He seems to have a good grasp on the game and should go really far. Alright, obviously I'm just kidding. He cracks me up and if you're not reading him, you're really missing a great blog.

There you go. Helixx and PokerGeek get pimped at the same time as Paul Phillips.


Good lord almighty, I do not want to go to work today.


Has anyone else noticed that my archive is all effed up? My entries on the current page go all the way back to September 7th and I haven't been able to find out why. I thought the page was taking a long time to load.

stoopid stoopid stoopid.

Somebody get me my helmet, the short bus is on it's way.


Ah crap, here's some funny stuff. Go read Pauly's Tao of Poker. He has a poll up asking who you'd rather invite to a poker game. Bush or Kerry. It's worth the read just for the comments.

One of the best....

2. I would be too afraid to "fling" chips into the pot playing against
Kerry. A little too much zing in my fling and I have to award him a purple heart
for injuries sustained in the line of duty. No way.

Go read and take the poll.


Is it time to leave yet?


In the event of a terrible accident, I have decided to write up my "Blogger" will.

To Scott, I leave all my bottles of Southern. I think a Texan should be able to make proper us of my stash.

To Pauly, I leave my actual blog. He already has 10,689 blogs. What's one more?

To BoyGenius, I leave our semi-weekly game with Lewey. That should build the bankroll nicely or drive you crazy. Not sure which would come first.

To Iggy, I leave my bankroll. Apparently he'll need it according to some low life anonymous commenter on his site. Idiots. Oh, don't get me going about anonymous commenters.

Iggy > everyone.

To Halverson, I leave you Minnesota. It's not mine to give, but you can have it. Hey, at least the Gourds played there. I don't even think they know that Philly exists.

To HDub, I leave my incredible poker skills. Actually, I wouldn't wish that on anyone. I take it back.

To the Amish kid down the road, I leave my liver.

To Landow, I leave a clue.


How's this for a crowded plane. Ech.

Reminds me of the time where I was sitting in the aisle seat and BigMike was booked in the middle seat. I was already on the plane well ahead of Mike and a lady had the window seat.

We were chatting along when BigMike started walked down the aisle. I turned to this poor woman and started saying things like...

"Oh no, you know that fat ass is going to sit next to me...."
"Crap, this happens to me all the time. Fat people smell...."
"Why don't you give him the window seat and sit next to me"

She was completely stunned. She kept telling me to shut up because BigMike was getting closer and closer. As he stopped at our aisle, I just said....

"Oh Christ!"

Her eyes were burning a hole in me.

BigMike looks down and says, "Hey Al, what's going on". I replied, "Not much, how you doing?"

When I looked over at the poor woman in the window seat, she had turned 3 different shades of purple and actually leaned over and hit me.

She was grumbling the entire flight to New Orleans. We got a nice chuckle out of that one.


I need to give a yell to AROHM on Party Poker. It's not very often I get recognized on Party by a reader.

So what's up arohm.

Well folks. I think this concludes my final post until next weekend.

I will try to upload pics while I'm down there but not real sure what kind of internet access I'll have.

I hope everyone has a good week, and I'll catch y'all later.


As a parting present, check out Florida's Electronic Voting System.


Wednesday, October 27, 2004

More random stuff 

Screw 'em all. Screw work. Today, nothing but blogging, preparing for vacation, and reading. That's just a joke for anyone who happens to read this from my company. Yikes.

Here's my question for the thousands and thousands of reader out there. The house I'm renting has a pool with a tiny island in the middle.

We get there Saturday afternoon. Who's going to be the first one found passed out on the little island (me, BigMike, Lewey, or the wifey) and what day?

And to you Brad, I didn't include you in the list because you're the easy choice.

My bet is that somewhere in the middle of the week, after we've cleared out the stockpile of booze that we picked up at the duty free shop in Philly, we're going to have a Lord of Flies incident on the wee island. Who's bringing the pig? Look out for Piggy!

Oh right, Mrs. CantHang is bringing the pig.


How about some big pimping.

Pauly has a great writeup on Tao of Pauly from his trip to Rhode Island. Sounds like a nice relaxing time. Dr. Pauly, King of All Bloggers, has been writing non-stop on something like 6,236 different blogs. Now about the next great American novel....

In honor of Pauly's "5 lists", since he mentions them also on the Tao of Pauly, my 5 favorite Pauly 5 lists in the last 5 weeks.

1. Recent Google Referrals in the Last 24 Hours - size of John Holmes penis hehehe
2. Last 5 Books I Saw People Reading on the Subway - The Holy Bible? All you heathens are going to hell anyway.
3. Last 5 Google Refferals That Made Me Laugh - Bellagio hookers. Always something good to know.
4. Recent Poker Music - If you'll be my Dixie chicken.....
5. American Cities I Visited the Most in the Last Decade - Philly baby!


For HDub, I dub thee, King of Comment Spam. Anyone who uses Bloglines knows that he has been hit with a HUGE amount of comment spam. Even with counter measures set up. I told him my favorite spam was for smokers.com

This week he has another great post "Lessons learned from a garbage hand". Go check it out. You want poker content, there it is.


The poker-playing, continent-hopping, snow-bunny-banging Penguin is back with another post and this sound advice.

That's it. The Penguin's new most sage piece of advice ever, based on the perhaps six hours play since his return.

Fold hands that don't stand a good chance of winning.

Of course, everyone's first stop should be the blogfather himself to check for a new uber post. Drunkards beware of drunken Iggy's proposing to play O8. Beware!

Since Iggy liked my picture of the Guardian Angel of Poker Bloggers, here are some more pics.


Auntie Maudie's been busy messing around with Photoshop. Check out her World Poker Blogger Tour logo. Pretty cool. All the bloggers have more talent in their little pinky than I have in my big bloated body.


My man Otis has been on quite a roll over at UpForPoker. I can't even point out one to link to. They've all been great. Plus, he has some info about pokersavy.com looking for home games. Did Otis kick CJ off his own blog?


Halverson left a comment earlier about my 'revised' Esquire list. Come on Chris, let us know who we forgot. There are so many out there. Gack.


Felicia has finished up her reporting from The Orleans and the WPPA. Thanks for the writeups and the warnings.

Remember, new website.


And last but not least, The Boy Genius has been pounding out daily 2000+ word posts on just about every subject.


Oh Mother Variance, thou art a bitch.


So I come to find out the Senator Arlen Specter is coming to speak at my company tomorrow. He'll be doing a Q&A session. My first question.....

"Yes Senator. About that magic bullet......"


"It was one of those situations that was not, you know, something fun."


That's the best I can bang of so far this morning. Cheers and have a good day.


Tuesday, October 26, 2004

It's official, the entire world is conspiring against me. No time for anything the last two days. So that really puts blogging on the back burner for the moment.

But here's three ways to lower workplace productivity.

First, the blogfather has a new Uber post up with plenty of yummy new material.

Second, a new simple new game to waste away the day. Below is my high score. Come and get me SirFWALGMan

Third, start dreaming about your next vacation. How's this for a cruise?

3 work days. That's all I have to get through before vacation.


Monday, October 25, 2004


I had a nice relaxing weekend. Made first or second in the 5 SnG's I played. Sweated the blogfather as he came in 70th out of 1,700 players in the Party Poker Million (you're my boy Blue!), got loaded Saturday night, played drunk, wasted, polluted O8 with Iggy at 3am, lost my buyin, and hung out with BigMike for the football games yesterday.

I had it all written up in classic AlCantHang rambling, clicked the Publish button two seconds before I realized I didn't back it up. Of course, another !#$!&*&^ Blogger ate my post story.

Before everyone starts berating me in the comments....

I know, I know, I know. I'm an idiot.


I made a dreadful mistake leaving the Guardian Angel of all Poker Bloggers off my amended Esquire / BoyGenius list. Hey, if she's not your Guardian Angel, you're more than welcome to find your own. Me and Pauly will keep her to ourselves.