Saturday, January 16, 2010
2010: Off to a good start
Philly 'burbs
January 2010
We're just a few days into the new year and I haven't had much time to really sit down to get my thoughts in writing. It's been a pretty stellar start to 2010 after a 2009 that was my best in a very long time. It will be tough to beat last year but it's doing a fine job trying right off the bat. There have been some minor inconveniences business-wise but they just seem to highlight the good things in the last two weeks. May be I'll even take some time in the future to tell you about them.
I'm in the process of planning my first half travel plans which will once again find me spending time with my good friends in G-Vegas and sitting on the grass watching Spring Training Phillies games. Mardi Gras was a passing idea but I'll make up for missing that by spending a bunch of quality time with the gang down in Key West. Anywhere from a week to a few months depending on how juicy I find the local poker games or how quickly I plow through my bankroll on nekkid girl bull riding prop bets. Texas, Canada, Arizona, and California continue to be on my wishlist. Aim high.
I'm still cruising along with the Full Tilt gig at Poker from the Rail and I have some great things in the works. I plan to tear up the WSOP in my second year better than my first. I will buckle down for two months of intensity to justify my existence in this silly industry before continuing the insanity that is my life. I will extend my personal record for "consecutive years spent in a drunken oblivion". Somewhere along the lines someone thought they wanted to hear whatever stories I had to tell.
I've also begun contributing to Pokerati Dan's new webiste Soccerati. It will be fun talking about one of my favorite sports (1. Baseball 2. Soccer 3. NFL...) especially with the buildup to the 2010 World Cup. We'll see how we deal with balancing the World Cup and World Series of Poker this summer. Dan has managed to wrangle up something like 9 different writers so there will be plenty to read.
Even though 2009 was outstanding, I'm looking to make 2010 crush all others. Luckily I have a fine group around me to come along on this sick journey. I will see you when I hit your little city/town/borough/shanty.
Just point me in the direction of a good dive bar and bottle of booze.
|
January 2010
We're just a few days into the new year and I haven't had much time to really sit down to get my thoughts in writing. It's been a pretty stellar start to 2010 after a 2009 that was my best in a very long time. It will be tough to beat last year but it's doing a fine job trying right off the bat. There have been some minor inconveniences business-wise but they just seem to highlight the good things in the last two weeks. May be I'll even take some time in the future to tell you about them.
I'm in the process of planning my first half travel plans which will once again find me spending time with my good friends in G-Vegas and sitting on the grass watching Spring Training Phillies games. Mardi Gras was a passing idea but I'll make up for missing that by spending a bunch of quality time with the gang down in Key West. Anywhere from a week to a few months depending on how juicy I find the local poker games or how quickly I plow through my bankroll on nekkid girl bull riding prop bets. Texas, Canada, Arizona, and California continue to be on my wishlist. Aim high.
I'm still cruising along with the Full Tilt gig at Poker from the Rail and I have some great things in the works. I plan to tear up the WSOP in my second year better than my first. I will buckle down for two months of intensity to justify my existence in this silly industry before continuing the insanity that is my life. I will extend my personal record for "consecutive years spent in a drunken oblivion". Somewhere along the lines someone thought they wanted to hear whatever stories I had to tell.
I've also begun contributing to Pokerati Dan's new webiste Soccerati. It will be fun talking about one of my favorite sports (1. Baseball 2. Soccer 3. NFL...) especially with the buildup to the 2010 World Cup. We'll see how we deal with balancing the World Cup and World Series of Poker this summer. Dan has managed to wrangle up something like 9 different writers so there will be plenty to read.
Even though 2009 was outstanding, I'm looking to make 2010 crush all others. Luckily I have a fine group around me to come along on this sick journey. I will see you when I hit your little city/town/borough/shanty.
Just point me in the direction of a good dive bar and bottle of booze.
Monday, December 28, 2009
Dirndl Dirndl Dirndl
I think I finally have the new comment system up but still needing a few tweaks, feel free to give it a shot to help a brother out.
The Daily Crutch
December 2009
It's a tough job going through the old archives looking at pictures of scantily clad (or some cases, un-clad) girls in an effort to kickstart my extremely dormant creativity. The first two pictures jumped out at me and I remember that DonkeyPuncher and the BoyGenius were especially enamored with the Dirndl.
Dirndl: a type of traditional dress worn in southern Germany, Liechtenstein and Austria, based on the historical costume of Alpine peasants.
I've posted a few over the years and even picked up a few new ones to update the catalog. Enjoy.
OK, so it's not a dirndl
How 'bout pirate girls?
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The Daily Crutch
December 2009
It's a tough job going through the old archives looking at pictures of scantily clad (or some cases, un-clad) girls in an effort to kickstart my extremely dormant creativity. The first two pictures jumped out at me and I remember that DonkeyPuncher and the BoyGenius were especially enamored with the Dirndl.
Dirndl: a type of traditional dress worn in southern Germany, Liechtenstein and Austria, based on the historical costume of Alpine peasants.
I've posted a few over the years and even picked up a few new ones to update the catalog. Enjoy.
OK, so it's not a dirndl
How 'bout pirate girls?
Thursday, December 24, 2009
The Southern Comfort Files
You must forgive the screwed up comment section. Beloved Haloscan has gone away and I'm trying to get the new comment system set up correctly.
The Daily Crutch
December 2009
I'm going through nearly 6 years worth of posted images and will be posting a ton over the holidays. Here's the first go'round.
I know it's completely shocking to the world, but I do enjoy tipping back the occasional Southern Comfort. That generally means plenty of chances to snap pictures of bottles in various states of fullness. Here are just a few of my favorite SoCo pictures from the last six years. (There may be some that are NSFW like this one, those I will link and warn)
The one and only Bradoween since I started the site
Rules for the Al Can't Hang Experience can be found here
Portable shot carrier anyone?
Terri pouring a shot, not usually a big deal, this was the St. Patrick's Day booze massacre
I would be called later this night and invited to the Playboy Mansion
(aka called up to the Big Leagues)
The stash for me and BigMike in St. Martin
The booze lasted about 36 hours
For reference, this is what they mean by "Al-sized shot"
The booze starter kit for Key West in 2007
I thought I imagined this walking down Royal St. during Mardi Gras
Tailgating before the Phillies World Series parade
Kegs SoCo and eggs (with bacon!)
Trying to tilt the players at Gracie and SSP's Poker Dome
Random bartender at the Hooker Bar with yet another empty
I'll always support a place that provides my own stock of SoCo
This was a common theme on my road trip last year
Empty bottles scattered down the east coast
My Key West Darlin' Nikki
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The Daily Crutch
December 2009
I'm going through nearly 6 years worth of posted images and will be posting a ton over the holidays. Here's the first go'round.
I know it's completely shocking to the world, but I do enjoy tipping back the occasional Southern Comfort. That generally means plenty of chances to snap pictures of bottles in various states of fullness. Here are just a few of my favorite SoCo pictures from the last six years. (There may be some that are NSFW like this one, those I will link and warn)
The one and only Bradoween since I started the site
Rules for the Al Can't Hang Experience can be found here
Portable shot carrier anyone?
Terri pouring a shot, not usually a big deal, this was the St. Patrick's Day booze massacre
I would be called later this night and invited to the Playboy Mansion
(aka called up to the Big Leagues)
The stash for me and BigMike in St. Martin
The booze lasted about 36 hours
For reference, this is what they mean by "Al-sized shot"
The booze starter kit for Key West in 2007
I thought I imagined this walking down Royal St. during Mardi Gras
Tailgating before the Phillies World Series parade
Trying to tilt the players at Gracie and SSP's Poker Dome
Random bartender at the Hooker Bar with yet another empty
I'll always support a place that provides my own stock of SoCo
This was a common theme on my road trip last year
Empty bottles scattered down the east coast
My Key West Darlin' Nikki
2009 Christmas Present
The Great Northeast
December 2009
OK bloggers and readers and random nudie google gawkers, I'm taking a quick break from trying to recount the few Vegas memories I have floating in my head to wish everyone safe and happy holidays. Watch out for the semi-tarded amateurs who will take this time to overindulge. I'm spending the last few days of the year going over my 2009 via pictures and video. I hope to have a 2009 recap video similar to what Pauly puts out each year. This was my first full year as a first class degenerate and a good fucking year it was.
I also found the need to download every single image from the alcanthang.com server looking for some things and realized I have some gems there also. Over the next few days I'll do nothing but post a bunch of old images. That should entertaining. I'm also chopping the holy hell out of the blogroll on the right, don't be offended.
Until then, Pauly put out the December version of Truckin' for a nice Christmas present.
Cheers and see you on the other side.
December 2009, Vol. 8, Issue 12
1. Stiff Santa by Paul McGuire
The Beverly Center had one strict rule -- never under any circumstances remove the bunny head in public. That would mortify young children. Josh turned to Ritalin to solve his problems... More
2. Christmas Money for Misty by Johnny Hughes
Misty laid her best story on Sam, her road story. She was temporarily broke, like most casino folks, but she was to inherit the historic Morgan Ranch, 473 oil wells, 47,000 acres, and a bunch of cows in the Texas panhandle... More
3. The Hobby by Milton Burton
The driver himself was a small-time coke pusher and wannabe heavy metal musician named Ronnie DeLoach who would never make it big, partly because he was void of any real musical talent. But mostly this sad fact could be attributed to his very limited life span... More
4. Dick-Hole, Part II by Bobby Bracelet
Most guys will yank it twenty times a week but they won't feel their balls for lumps. I see it all the time... More
5. Absence of Fear by George Tate
The turns became hard to handle and Gatlin knew it wouldn't take much to be over a guard rail and down the side on his back, load, tractor, and all. He suddenly cleared his mind and focused on the words, "Turn off the engine, that's it."... More
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December 2009
OK bloggers and readers and random nudie google gawkers, I'm taking a quick break from trying to recount the few Vegas memories I have floating in my head to wish everyone safe and happy holidays. Watch out for the semi-tarded amateurs who will take this time to overindulge. I'm spending the last few days of the year going over my 2009 via pictures and video. I hope to have a 2009 recap video similar to what Pauly puts out each year. This was my first full year as a first class degenerate and a good fucking year it was.
I also found the need to download every single image from the alcanthang.com server looking for some things and realized I have some gems there also. Over the next few days I'll do nothing but post a bunch of old images. That should entertaining. I'm also chopping the holy hell out of the blogroll on the right, don't be offended.
Until then, Pauly put out the December version of Truckin' for a nice Christmas present.
Cheers and see you on the other side.
December 2009, Vol. 8, Issue 12
1. Stiff Santa by Paul McGuire
The Beverly Center had one strict rule -- never under any circumstances remove the bunny head in public. That would mortify young children. Josh turned to Ritalin to solve his problems... More
2. Christmas Money for Misty by Johnny Hughes
Misty laid her best story on Sam, her road story. She was temporarily broke, like most casino folks, but she was to inherit the historic Morgan Ranch, 473 oil wells, 47,000 acres, and a bunch of cows in the Texas panhandle... More
3. The Hobby by Milton Burton
The driver himself was a small-time coke pusher and wannabe heavy metal musician named Ronnie DeLoach who would never make it big, partly because he was void of any real musical talent. But mostly this sad fact could be attributed to his very limited life span... More
4. Dick-Hole, Part II by Bobby Bracelet
Most guys will yank it twenty times a week but they won't feel their balls for lumps. I see it all the time... More
5. Absence of Fear by George Tate
The turns became hard to handle and Gatlin knew it wouldn't take much to be over a guard rail and down the side on his back, load, tractor, and all. He suddenly cleared his mind and focused on the words, "Turn off the engine, that's it."... More
Friday, December 18, 2009
The Welfare Check
Las Vegas
December 2009
(Phone ringing)
(Phone ringing)
"What? I'm zleeeeping?"
"Mr. CantHang? Sir, this is security. We have a call from a friend who is concerned about you. Are you ok sir?"
"What?"
"Sir, are you ok? Someone called and they were concerned for you. We need to do a welfare check to make sure you are ok."
"What? Yeah. I'm fine. Just zleeeeping. Think I drank too much tonight."
"OK sir, we'll cancel the security guard on his way up. But you have someone standing at your door waiting. You should tell them you are ok."
"What?"
"Goodbye sir."
Stupid booze.
I stumbled to the door, still fully clothed from whenever, and saw the good Dr. Pauly through my teeny tiny peep hole. He seemed generally relieved I was alive, I was touched.
I was also still completely fucked up. He came into the room I assume to make sure I hadn't slashed up a hooker or two (Roll me once, shame on you. Roll me twice...) but I think the only incrementing evidence was a fucked up room service pizza and 3/4 of a Heineken.
He said people were worried and people were concerned I was missing in action and people wanted to know where the hell I was. None of this made any sense since it couldn't be that late. His assertion that no one had seen me in 17 hours made no sense. He pieced together Iggy getting me near my floor sometime that morning and it was now very late in the day, even though my body was calling bullshit. The Eagles were still on, see? Turns out they were the late night game that weekend and I was truly way past my due date. My trusty iPhone would tell the truth.
I think I broke it's memory buffer. The lists of missed calls, texts, voicemail was longer than the screen. Damn, this wasn't good. Fuck, imagine if I'd have won that god damned tournament. I did the first sensible thing. Let up a smoke, made my apologies and tried to wrap my head around everything. I kept throwing things at my mental wall and shit just wasn't sticking.
The doc made sure I was alive, handed over his glorious bottle of water, and told me to get my shit together whenever I could. He also asked me the one thing the brought a smile to this pour wretched soul.
"When I go back, should I fuck with everyone and say I couldn't find you?"
These are my friends, the ones who keep me within shouting distance of sane.
|
December 2009
(Phone ringing)
"What? I'm zleeeeping?"
"Mr. CantHang? Sir, this is security. We have a call from a friend who is concerned about you. Are you ok sir?"
"What?"
"Sir, are you ok? Someone called and they were concerned for you. We need to do a welfare check to make sure you are ok."
"What? Yeah. I'm fine. Just zleeeeping. Think I drank too much tonight."
"OK sir, we'll cancel the security guard on his way up. But you have someone standing at your door waiting. You should tell them you are ok."
"What?"
"Goodbye sir."
Stupid booze.
I stumbled to the door, still fully clothed from whenever, and saw the good Dr. Pauly through my teeny tiny peep hole. He seemed generally relieved I was alive, I was touched.
I was also still completely fucked up. He came into the room I assume to make sure I hadn't slashed up a hooker or two (Roll me once, shame on you. Roll me twice...) but I think the only incrementing evidence was a fucked up room service pizza and 3/4 of a Heineken.
He said people were worried and people were concerned I was missing in action and people wanted to know where the hell I was. None of this made any sense since it couldn't be that late. His assertion that no one had seen me in 17 hours made no sense. He pieced together Iggy getting me near my floor sometime that morning and it was now very late in the day, even though my body was calling bullshit. The Eagles were still on, see? Turns out they were the late night game that weekend and I was truly way past my due date. My trusty iPhone would tell the truth.
I think I broke it's memory buffer. The lists of missed calls, texts, voicemail was longer than the screen. Damn, this wasn't good. Fuck, imagine if I'd have won that god damned tournament. I did the first sensible thing. Let up a smoke, made my apologies and tried to wrap my head around everything. I kept throwing things at my mental wall and shit just wasn't sticking.
The doc made sure I was alive, handed over his glorious bottle of water, and told me to get my shit together whenever I could. He also asked me the one thing the brought a smile to this pour wretched soul.
"When I go back, should I fuck with everyone and say I couldn't find you?"
These are my friends, the ones who keep me within shouting distance of sane.
Tuesday, December 08, 2009
Off we go once again
From the ether in between
December 2009
Dropping one last note before jumping on a plane Thursday morning. While you are waiting for 200 bloggers to return with their tales of debauchery, you can still follow along semi-live 140 characters at a time. Several big names (plus my puny self) will be firing off their experiences into the internet airways via their Twitter accounts.
I've listed a few below to follow but the two best ways would probably be Gracie's WPBT follow list or just search for anything with a #WPBT tag.
@AlCantHang
@TaoPauly
@_Otis_
@Iggylicious
@Drizztdj
@JoeSpeaker
@StB08
@Bammer
I got lazy after just 8 links, go use the WPBT follow list and we'll be square.
It won't be long before I'll board USAir flight 435 to Las Vegas (does that sound like a crashing number? Can you hear a broadcaster saying "USAir flight 435 is down somewhere over a desolate flyover state"?) If these are my last words than let's go with
"He just wanted to preform The Procedure one more time."
or
"I'd like to order one large pepperoni pizza...."
|
December 2009
Dropping one last note before jumping on a plane Thursday morning. While you are waiting for 200 bloggers to return with their tales of debauchery, you can still follow along semi-live 140 characters at a time. Several big names (plus my puny self) will be firing off their experiences into the internet airways via their Twitter accounts.
I've listed a few below to follow but the two best ways would probably be Gracie's WPBT follow list or just search for anything with a #WPBT tag.
@AlCantHang
@TaoPauly
@_Otis_
@Iggylicious
@Drizztdj
@JoeSpeaker
@StB08
@Bammer
I got lazy after just 8 links, go use the WPBT follow list and we'll be square.
It won't be long before I'll board USAir flight 435 to Las Vegas (does that sound like a crashing number? Can you hear a broadcaster saying "USAir flight 435 is down somewhere over a desolate flyover state"?) If these are my last words than let's go with
"He just wanted to preform The Procedure one more time."
or
"I'd like to order one large pepperoni pizza...."
Monday, December 07, 2009
Surviving Las Vegas
'burbs of Philly
December 2009
Hells yeah, it's about time to shut this god damn laptop down and head west. Back to Vegas without worrying about covering a poker tournament, playing "dodge the lemur", or tracking down narcissistic players. There is even a possibility that I'll hop on that plane Thursday morning without my trusty computer companion. I spent the weekend working out my liver with the old Boathouse crew, plenty of triple Soco's and late night/morning bed times. I even warmed up some of my worst pick up lines for the occasion. It would be appropriate to feel honored should I use one of them on you.
I still have a shit-ton of stuff to get done for the real jobby bloggy over the next two days. Luckily I have plenty of time to get it done since my sleep schedule has been whittled down to crashing around 4am and waking back up at 7am. I'm beginning to feel damn near the insomnia level of the Good Doctor.
I mentioned in my last post that Pauly generally posts a list of tips for those heading to Vegas for the first time, especially if it's during the yearly donking of the bloggers. I'm glad to see he's not only re-posted the list but has added to it.
First my short little list of Do's and Don't's (how does one properly punctuate that line?):
Invading Las Vegas Tips Reprise by Dr. Pauly
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December 2009
Hells yeah, it's about time to shut this god damn laptop down and head west. Back to Vegas without worrying about covering a poker tournament, playing "dodge the lemur", or tracking down narcissistic players. There is even a possibility that I'll hop on that plane Thursday morning without my trusty computer companion. I spent the weekend working out my liver with the old Boathouse crew, plenty of triple Soco's and late night/morning bed times. I even warmed up some of my worst pick up lines for the occasion. It would be appropriate to feel honored should I use one of them on you.
I still have a shit-ton of stuff to get done for the real jobby bloggy over the next two days. Luckily I have plenty of time to get it done since my sleep schedule has been whittled down to crashing around 4am and waking back up at 7am. I'm beginning to feel damn near the insomnia level of the Good Doctor.
I mentioned in my last post that Pauly generally posts a list of tips for those heading to Vegas for the first time, especially if it's during the yearly donking of the bloggers. I'm glad to see he's not only re-posted the list but has added to it.
First my short little list of Do's and Don't's (how does one properly punctuate that line?):
- DO play Pai Gow at some point. Don't be intimidated, it's a piece of cake. There will likely be a few blogger dominated tables each night.Now that I've completed my tiny list, you should go immediately to Pauly and read his tips for Vegas. Print them out, memorize them, live them, love them. They will save your life in the end. And don't forget Tip #34.
- DO play craps at the Casino Royale. There's a very good chance I'm going to get wasted at the IP on Thursday night and walk down the block for the game. $5 craps with 100 times odds. Can't be beat on the strip. I started playing the game at the first blogger gathering. "Press it Kenneth!" - BobbyBracelet
- Do play the IP dealer-tainer video roulette if a blogger "game" starts off. Especially if Freddie Mercury is on stage.
- DO drink freely. That doesn't necessarily mean try to keep up with me, but you should enjoy yourself with a cocktail or twelve. An hour.
- DO walk up to any damned blogger you see and introduce yourself. Chances are I'll be in the middle of buying my 1000th round of shots so join right in.
- DO NOT take a picture of Iggy and post it on the internet. That takes away at least two hours of my life just talking him off the ledge.
- DO NOT sleep unless you absolutely have to do it. You'll have plenty of time to sleep when you crawl your hungover ass back to Pennsyl-tucky or whatever flyover state in which you reside.
- DO NOT get rolled by a hooker. Dr. Pauly covers this little bit, but I feel the need to personally restate the obvious. However, if it does happen DO tell everyone about it because it will make for a fine story/blog post.
- DO NOT miss the mix games at the MGM and the subsequent drunken mess at the sportsbook around the corner. This has become one of the best impromptu places to gather and bullshit.
- Finally, DO NOT be offended if your real name slips my memory. I have a long history of alcohol abuse and my brain is sketchy remembering names of those I've known for decades.
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Prepare yourself WPBT-style
The Great Northeast
November 2009
I am so far behind in posting that I might never catch up. I have the first two days of the Vegas November Nine trip ready to publish but I'm taking a pause for the cause. It's just a few short weeks now until a bunch of nasty degenerates descend upon the Vegas strip to do embarrassing things and make a shameful spectacle of themselves. God damn cowboys in town for the National Finals Rodeo. I think a bunch of poker bloggers will be there also.
It seems hard to believe it was 6 years ago when Dr. Pauly posed the innocent question to a few folks about joining him and Derek for their yearly gamble-palooza in Vegas. What started as a few people rolling westward quickly warped into the first live blogger tournament (with unending help by PokerProf and flipchip) at Sam's Town. Insane fun at the Sherwood Forest bar, Iggy-impersonations, bad gumbo, bruised ribs, stretch Excursions (with death metal, weed, and some huddled bible-belters), Whiplash the Cowboy Monkey, caustic Felicia, signing worthless autographs for the kids, and a Don Swayze/Tony Siragusa siting.
That was just the first night.
There can only be one first time, and I'm pretty damned proud to have gotten on the ride at the start. Some of these random strangers went from "online poker friends" to drinking friends to colleagues. A few I include among my best friends on the planet.
Six years ago I was a hard drinking, happily married, well-positioned company man with nothing but great things lined up in the future. These days the only thing that remains is the hard drinking. And the relentless chain smoking. I would have coughed up toxic Marlboro fumes in your face had you told me in December 2004 I would be here at this point of my life.
I only give one piece of advice for first-timers and veterans alike. Only priority is make sure to have a blast. Don't get caught up trying to meet everybody for the first time, don't forget to enjoy the moment instead of trying to make one happen. Spontaneous Pai Gow session, get your ass in there. You see a long-haired freak lining up twenty people for a shot, get yourself in line and chug away. Find a blogger poker game that weekend, the one time you can drop The Hammer with impunity. And for god's sake if you want to keep up with me have all your permissions slip signed and shots up to date.
Here is my very fluid schedule for that weekend.
Thursday - Arrive in Vegas, at some point I will be knocking back shots at the IP Geisha Bar and wrangling up Pai Gow participants. If I get a bug up my butt I'll venture over to Casino Royale for craps.
Friday - Apparently I'm shooting a round of golf with BWOP, Bammer, and the crew. I'm all paid up but there's only a 5% chance I'm in any condition to make the golf course. Friday night I will be camping out at the MGM Sportsbook bar for a few hours. I will then disappear into the evening towards Green Valley Ranch to catch the Steel Panther. I have no idea who is interested and have no plans to organize anything.
Saturday - After not sleeping for 48 hours, I'll be in perfect shape to play the WPBT tournament at Caesar's. Dead Money walking in the door but I'll have fun with it. The rest of the day will be spent sitting at some random bar/sportsbook/poker table.
Sunday - Football, football, football.
All of that may happen, some, or none at all. I've come to understand the position of my friends who spend so much time working in Vegas, it's so rare to be in town without being "on the clock" and I plan to use this as a good ol' drinking vacation. Lead, follow, or get the fuck out of my way to the bar.
Two other bits of advice from the experts. Otis dropped this classic line on me one year when things slid sideways in a hurry. Raging solo.
Finally, the good doctor generally re-posts his "Bloggers Invading Las Vegas Tips". You can find Version 5.0 here but I'll just give you a few of the top to know, #20 is the one I heroically destroyed a few years ago.
The (wrongly titled) Daily Crutch
Simple this time. Five of my favorite pictures from past gatherings. If you'd like a real chuckle search on WPBT on flickr.
The first and only "authorized" picture of the Blogfatherfrom that first night at Sherwood Forest.
When playing low-limit lemur games, buy out all the $1 chips from the cage like Drizz
(photo from Bill Rini)
Otis staring down CJ at the Imperial Palace tournament, Joanada DANK in the middle
(photo from Bill Rini)
Hanging out with The Fat Guy and Poker Prof
Looking over past pictures and this one gave me the biggest surprise,we were playing in the Hard Rock charity tournament.
The always lovely Liv Boeree in the foreground
Otis put together this YouTube clip from past gatherings
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November 2009
I am so far behind in posting that I might never catch up. I have the first two days of the Vegas November Nine trip ready to publish but I'm taking a pause for the cause. It's just a few short weeks now until a bunch of nasty degenerates descend upon the Vegas strip to do embarrassing things and make a shameful spectacle of themselves. God damn cowboys in town for the National Finals Rodeo. I think a bunch of poker bloggers will be there also.
It seems hard to believe it was 6 years ago when Dr. Pauly posed the innocent question to a few folks about joining him and Derek for their yearly gamble-palooza in Vegas. What started as a few people rolling westward quickly warped into the first live blogger tournament (with unending help by PokerProf and flipchip) at Sam's Town. Insane fun at the Sherwood Forest bar, Iggy-impersonations, bad gumbo, bruised ribs, stretch Excursions (with death metal, weed, and some huddled bible-belters), Whiplash the Cowboy Monkey, caustic Felicia, signing worthless autographs for the kids, and a Don Swayze/Tony Siragusa siting.
That was just the first night.
There can only be one first time, and I'm pretty damned proud to have gotten on the ride at the start. Some of these random strangers went from "online poker friends" to drinking friends to colleagues. A few I include among my best friends on the planet.
Six years ago I was a hard drinking, happily married, well-positioned company man with nothing but great things lined up in the future. These days the only thing that remains is the hard drinking. And the relentless chain smoking. I would have coughed up toxic Marlboro fumes in your face had you told me in December 2004 I would be here at this point of my life.
I only give one piece of advice for first-timers and veterans alike. Only priority is make sure to have a blast. Don't get caught up trying to meet everybody for the first time, don't forget to enjoy the moment instead of trying to make one happen. Spontaneous Pai Gow session, get your ass in there. You see a long-haired freak lining up twenty people for a shot, get yourself in line and chug away. Find a blogger poker game that weekend, the one time you can drop The Hammer with impunity. And for god's sake if you want to keep up with me have all your permissions slip signed and shots up to date.
Here is my very fluid schedule for that weekend.
Thursday - Arrive in Vegas, at some point I will be knocking back shots at the IP Geisha Bar and wrangling up Pai Gow participants. If I get a bug up my butt I'll venture over to Casino Royale for craps.
Friday - Apparently I'm shooting a round of golf with BWOP, Bammer, and the crew. I'm all paid up but there's only a 5% chance I'm in any condition to make the golf course. Friday night I will be camping out at the MGM Sportsbook bar for a few hours. I will then disappear into the evening towards Green Valley Ranch to catch the Steel Panther. I have no idea who is interested and have no plans to organize anything.
Saturday - After not sleeping for 48 hours, I'll be in perfect shape to play the WPBT tournament at Caesar's. Dead Money walking in the door but I'll have fun with it. The rest of the day will be spent sitting at some random bar/sportsbook/poker table.
Sunday - Football, football, football.
All of that may happen, some, or none at all. I've come to understand the position of my friends who spend so much time working in Vegas, it's so rare to be in town without being "on the clock" and I plan to use this as a good ol' drinking vacation. Lead, follow, or get the fuck out of my way to the bar.
Two other bits of advice from the experts. Otis dropped this classic line on me one year when things slid sideways in a hurry. Raging solo.
Redemption in Raging SoloFine advice.
In Vegas, one's opportunity for a solo rage is ubiquitous. For as long as he wants or as long as he can stand, he can prop himself up on the shoulders of friends. And when he is ready, he can step out into the dry air, blink at the lights, and start to walk. Where he stops--if he stops--is of little consequence. What matters is that he rages solo. It need not be a trip-long or even night-long event. It can last as long or short as he wants. It can be sober or drunk. It can start at one end of the strip and end at the other or it can start on one side of the street and be only bound by a crosswalk. What matters is the rage. It can cost $1,000 or $1. It just doesn't matter.
Raging solo--define it as you like--is the key. At the end is redemption. And with redemption comes a whole new way of looking at things.
Finally, the good doctor generally re-posts his "Bloggers Invading Las Vegas Tips". You can find Version 5.0 here but I'll just give you a few of the top to know, #20 is the one I heroically destroyed a few years ago.
20. Don't get rolled by a hooker.~
21. Avoid hangovers. Stay drunk.
23. Don't die.
The (wrongly titled) Daily Crutch
Simple this time. Five of my favorite pictures from past gatherings. If you'd like a real chuckle search on WPBT on flickr.
The first and only "authorized" picture of the Blogfather
When playing low-limit lemur games, buy out all the $1 chips from the cage like Drizz
(photo from Bill Rini)
Otis staring down CJ at the Imperial Palace tournament, Joanada DANK in the middle
(photo from Bill Rini)
Hanging out with The Fat Guy and Poker Prof
Looking over past pictures and this one gave me the biggest surprise,
The always lovely Liv Boeree in the foreground
Otis put together this YouTube clip from past gatherings
Monday, November 02, 2009
A Little Link Dumping
Philly 'burbs
November 2009
Hopefully anyone still reading this near empty space will not realize it took me 4 weeks to complete one monster post which I intended to be one day. Once I began getting it all down in writing I realized there was too much in those 4 short days to waste compressing. Whether anyone else agrees we'll never know. At least I got into the semi-regular pattern of writing here in the personal pages away from the paying gig across the street in poker land. I'm nowhere near to where I used to be and maybe that's for the best.
I finished up dealing with the Key West trip just in time to jump back on a damned plane to head west for Las Vegas. Some little poker tournament will be finishing up with some little poker player who keeps getting compared to Tiger Woods. What no one outside our little niche understands that this trip will have it's equal dose of good times as we only need to worry about 8 bustout hands and then we celebrate with excessive amounts of booze and bad food.
Before I head west again I realize I've been neglecting my linkage responsibilities to various sites and scenes. So consider this a last minute, possibly uber, link dump.
Speaking of uberposts, god damn it. September 13th? Bonus Code Iggy!
~
My favorite picture of the Amazon Room down to 18 Main Even players
I generally separate business and pleasure when it comes to the two blogs but I want to pass these links along since the November Nine is right around the corner. Sitting down in Key West with Spaceman and asked if he would want to contribute to a few posts handicapping the remaining players. He joined in and Riggstad came along and I think it came out well.
Poker from the Rail 2009 World Series of Poker November Nine Part 1
Poker from the Rail 2009 World Series of Poker November Nine Part 2
Poker from the Rail 2009 World Series of Poker November Nine Part 3
I also made a silly prop-bet with fellow Full Tilt blogger Michael Craig this weekend since we were both playing the 43,000 mess known as the FTOPS XIV Warmup tournament. He took time to come up with the terms and I agreed. And then won the last longer bet. Now Mr. Craig is required to play in a 2am Binion's tournament. I think Otis and I are going to go at the same time to see if we can't make this one big clusterfuck. My favorite line from his writeup.
Anybody remember that annoying BBT Battle of the Bloggers thing? Yeah, don't get your hopes up. But I wanted to mention that BBT regular "katiemother" had a big score last night finishing 5th in the Sunday Brawl for a cool $28,000. "Covering" these things gets to be a bit tedious when there are 30 some chuckleheads making ridiculous plays and it took me a while to even realize she was deep in the field.
Congrats!
(I'd love to link up but her blog shows as protected from the likes of me)
~
With ESPN ripping through the WSOP Main Event the last month or so it's just a stark reminder to my first full time covering the entire series. I get little glimpses of those who were stuck sitting near me for two full months, I even saw my fat ass walk across the screen a few times. Certainly pretending to work when I was actually looking for someone to hit up the Hooker Bar in the middle of the day. It was something I'll never forget.
The good doctor has been reviewing each episode after airing. They are great recaps and you're probably reading them already, but here are the links on the off chance someone from out of the blue just joined us.
Main Event Day 8, Part 1 on ESPN - Liquidity Crisis, Mucking Winners, and Down to 18
Main Event Day 7 on ESPN - Donkeys in the Rye
Main Event Day 6.5 on ESPN - Four Heavy Hitters, Jaws of Ivey, and AngryJulie
Main Event Day 5.5 and Day 6 on ESPN - Introducing the DonkeyBomber
Main Event Day 5 on ESPN - ElkY and Happy
Main Event Day 4 on ESPN - Bubbles and the World Series of Ivey
Main Event Day 3 on ESPN - Aussies, Ivey, and No Shake for Hellmuth
Main Event Day 2B on ESPN - A Kinder and Quieter Hellmuth and the Always Aloof Ivey Time
Main Event Day 2A on ESPN - The Fossilman and Costanza Show
~
There were three people in the Amazon room on a daily basis who really had to put up with my shit for those two months. Cali Jenn, Mean Gene and Joy Miller (who was my regular Hooker Bar companion). Gene just put a post up on the UB blog with a some of the great shots he took during the series. He was always snapping, editing, correcting pictures while I was fudging with my shitty little point-and-shoot. I figure I owe the UB blog a link back anyway since I'm linked over there, and I have no idea why. They have links to Phil Hellmuth, Annie Duke, Dr. Pauly, Wicked Chops Poker..... and then me. Who knows.
Memories of Things That Just Happened
~
I challenged CK to a Suicide Pool Challenge over on ESPN for shots during the Winter Gathering in Vegas, which is going horribly for me. I'm going to owe a ton of shots. She turned around and has a pool going for the November Nine. You can join up and if you beat me she'll buy you a shot in Vegas this December. You need to get over to the "Can Al Hang? Poker Challenge" and sign up quickly since they start this Saturday. Password is "alcanthang".
On Fantasy Sports Live I was finally able to string a few decent weeks together and qualify for the Tournament of Champions. Each week there are special games called "Sundays' with Dr. Pauly" with money added and such. I'm either really really good or really really bad. Mediocrity is for the weak.
~
Only a month late in posting October's Truckin'
The Daily Crutch
I guess I'm a hypocrite for calling it "daily" but I think you'll like today's selection. I just happened to catch her the ol' TV the other night and recalled that she's had a few looks in her career. Just a few of Linda Cardellini's roles included stints on Freaks and Geeks, ER, and Velman in the Scooby Doo movies. I had too many pictures to chose from but I narrowed it down. A little. It was a tough job. And nothing half-assed, click to embiggen.
Apparently she vamped up Velma just a little, no complaints here
I like her as a blonde, couldn't decide between the two, went with both
|
November 2009
Hopefully anyone still reading this near empty space will not realize it took me 4 weeks to complete one monster post which I intended to be one day. Once I began getting it all down in writing I realized there was too much in those 4 short days to waste compressing. Whether anyone else agrees we'll never know. At least I got into the semi-regular pattern of writing here in the personal pages away from the paying gig across the street in poker land. I'm nowhere near to where I used to be and maybe that's for the best.
I finished up dealing with the Key West trip just in time to jump back on a damned plane to head west for Las Vegas. Some little poker tournament will be finishing up with some little poker player who keeps getting compared to Tiger Woods. What no one outside our little niche understands that this trip will have it's equal dose of good times as we only need to worry about 8 bustout hands and then we celebrate with excessive amounts of booze and bad food.
Before I head west again I realize I've been neglecting my linkage responsibilities to various sites and scenes. So consider this a last minute, possibly uber, link dump.
Speaking of uberposts, god damn it. September 13th? Bonus Code Iggy!
~
My favorite picture of the Amazon Room down to 18 Main Even players
I generally separate business and pleasure when it comes to the two blogs but I want to pass these links along since the November Nine is right around the corner. Sitting down in Key West with Spaceman and asked if he would want to contribute to a few posts handicapping the remaining players. He joined in and Riggstad came along and I think it came out well.
Poker from the Rail 2009 World Series of Poker November Nine Part 1
Poker from the Rail 2009 World Series of Poker November Nine Part 2
Poker from the Rail 2009 World Series of Poker November Nine Part 3
I also made a silly prop-bet with fellow Full Tilt blogger Michael Craig this weekend since we were both playing the 43,000 mess known as the FTOPS XIV Warmup tournament. He took time to come up with the terms and I agreed. And then won the last longer bet. Now Mr. Craig is required to play in a 2am Binion's tournament. I think Otis and I are going to go at the same time to see if we can't make this one big clusterfuck. My favorite line from his writeup.
"More important, I should be thinking twice before tangling with this Al character, especially when it comes to crazy prop bets. Al treats dignity like Phil Ivey treats money."~
Anybody remember that annoying BBT Battle of the Bloggers thing? Yeah, don't get your hopes up. But I wanted to mention that BBT regular "katiemother" had a big score last night finishing 5th in the Sunday Brawl for a cool $28,000. "Covering" these things gets to be a bit tedious when there are 30 some chuckleheads making ridiculous plays and it took me a while to even realize she was deep in the field.
Congrats!
(I'd love to link up but her blog shows as protected from the likes of me)
~
With ESPN ripping through the WSOP Main Event the last month or so it's just a stark reminder to my first full time covering the entire series. I get little glimpses of those who were stuck sitting near me for two full months, I even saw my fat ass walk across the screen a few times. Certainly pretending to work when I was actually looking for someone to hit up the Hooker Bar in the middle of the day. It was something I'll never forget.
The good doctor has been reviewing each episode after airing. They are great recaps and you're probably reading them already, but here are the links on the off chance someone from out of the blue just joined us.
Main Event Day 8, Part 1 on ESPN - Liquidity Crisis, Mucking Winners, and Down to 18
Main Event Day 7 on ESPN - Donkeys in the Rye
Main Event Day 6.5 on ESPN - Four Heavy Hitters, Jaws of Ivey, and AngryJulie
Main Event Day 5.5 and Day 6 on ESPN - Introducing the DonkeyBomber
Main Event Day 5 on ESPN - ElkY and Happy
Main Event Day 4 on ESPN - Bubbles and the World Series of Ivey
Main Event Day 3 on ESPN - Aussies, Ivey, and No Shake for Hellmuth
Main Event Day 2B on ESPN - A Kinder and Quieter Hellmuth and the Always Aloof Ivey Time
Main Event Day 2A on ESPN - The Fossilman and Costanza Show
~
There were three people in the Amazon room on a daily basis who really had to put up with my shit for those two months. Cali Jenn, Mean Gene and Joy Miller (who was my regular Hooker Bar companion). Gene just put a post up on the UB blog with a some of the great shots he took during the series. He was always snapping, editing, correcting pictures while I was fudging with my shitty little point-and-shoot. I figure I owe the UB blog a link back anyway since I'm linked over there, and I have no idea why. They have links to Phil Hellmuth, Annie Duke, Dr. Pauly, Wicked Chops Poker..... and then me. Who knows.
Memories of Things That Just Happened
~
I challenged CK to a Suicide Pool Challenge over on ESPN for shots during the Winter Gathering in Vegas, which is going horribly for me. I'm going to owe a ton of shots. She turned around and has a pool going for the November Nine. You can join up and if you beat me she'll buy you a shot in Vegas this December. You need to get over to the "Can Al Hang? Poker Challenge" and sign up quickly since they start this Saturday. Password is "alcanthang".
On Fantasy Sports Live I was finally able to string a few decent weeks together and qualify for the Tournament of Champions. Each week there are special games called "Sundays' with Dr. Pauly" with money added and such. I'm either really really good or really really bad. Mediocrity is for the weak.
~
Only a month late in posting October's Truckin'
~
October 2009, Vol. 8, Issue 10
1. The Booth by Paul McGuire
A fidgety Larry had nowhere to blend in as only person sitting in a booth along the wall. The cops had to pass him on their way out and they'd know that he was fucked up. How could they not know... More
2. The Demon of Oscar Braathen's Tavern by Sigge S. Amdal
The baby wants attention and makes a horrible shrieking sound, making the hairs on my back stand up. That's exactly what you'd expect from a demon hovering above a deserted town. It's just doing what demons are supposed to be doing. But it freaks me out nevertheless... More
3. Just Lunch by Betty Underground
We're not strangers, though perhaps we should be; the span between the time when knew each other before and now, is vast. Back then, we didn't even know ourselves, and what we knew about each other was drawn with immature minds. When we first reconnected I'm sure we imagined what we thought the other had become... More
4. Danger Box by Curtis Krumel
In Mexico they have Montezuma's Revenge. In Iraq, the bane of the visitor is Saddam's Revenge. The source of the condition, like that of the Nile, is shrouded in mystery, but the effects are unmistakable.... More
5. Two Memories by Johnny Hughes
I was called in the middle of the night, when I was higher than a hawk's nest, and drunker than Cooter Brown. Joe explained the deal, and he and I both knew Jesse had a handful of warrants out, and unresolved entanglements with Texas laws... More
The Daily Crutch
I guess I'm a hypocrite for calling it "daily" but I think you'll like today's selection. I just happened to catch her the ol' TV the other night and recalled that she's had a few looks in her career. Just a few of Linda Cardellini's roles included stints on Freaks and Geeks, ER, and Velman in the Scooby Doo movies. I had too many pictures to chose from but I narrowed it down. A little. It was a tough job. And nothing half-assed, click to embiggen.
Apparently she vamped up Velma just a little, no complaints here
I like her as a blonde, couldn't decide between the two, went with both
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Back to Key West Part 4
Key West - Day 4
September 2009
For the second straight day in Key West I hit the sack in mostly decent shape. I bade a fair thee well to my drunk-mates and went back to my zebra room. We made loose plans for breakfast in the morning, promises of french toast with Godiva white chocolate sauce. Passing out was almost instantaneous.
I still can't believe I didn't snap a picture of my room, it was huge, sporting faux zebra skin rugs, and a huge elongated mask type thing that stood at least 4 feet tall. Scary as shit flipping on the light in a drunken fog to see that thing jump out of the dark. You can kind of get a view of it in the pictures here from their website.
I was pulled out of my coma by the trusty cell phone chirping away at me once again, the now common occurrence. It was the SpaceFolk just letting me know they were off on another sightseeing adventures following their breakfast. A breakfast which I once again slept through. A breakfast that saw Jason chow down on the aforementioned french toast. Fucking booze ruins lives, or so I hear. Often. Another morning down the drains but I was up and moving.
While they ran around the island looking at butterflies and 6-toed cats I was spending my birthday getting a little bit of work done. It was a fine lazy afternoon looking forward to the evening. It was our final night in town for this trip and it was still my birthday. When you turn ancient they let you celebrate longer, not knowing how many more of these might come around. We were going to have dinner with my friend Nikki before she had to work and then some respectable drinking.
The decision was made, Bagatelles on Duval Street would be the ones to provide us with our last supper. Nikki and I naturally arrive early to camp out at the bar while the SpaceFolk finish touring the island. It took me all of 5 seconds to read the menu and make my selection. Something called "Honey Fried Lobster Tail" which both Nikki and bartender highly recommended. All the locals have given it a shot.
Temura Battered Seven Ounce Lobster
served with Honey Butter and Wasabi Mash
Lock it up.
I wish I could get a picture to properly show the goodness on the plate
More food piled upon more food with an extra helping of double desert on top. It made for a very fine afternoon sitting around with friends eating great food and casual meandering conversations. It seemed no time had passed before Nikki was begging off to make it to work on time and the remaining three of us slowly crawled back to our little guest house. Not even a professional drinker on his birthday would able to turn around from that feast and jump straight into real world hardcore drinking. A little down time was required.
Before we crawled our way back into the bars, I was able to have one of those moments that you just can't make up. I made a big impression on a large group of people through no other method than being my normal bull in a china shop self.
Our guest house was haunted. That is if you believe in such things or wish to amuse yourself into paying extra money for the mere chance of seeing a disembodied spirit. I was just happy to have a place literally stumbling distance from my favorite bars. Marrero's GuestHouse Mansion (mansion? really?) even plays up the notion that some chippy is walking around in ghost form, in a town already that believes half the places haunted and New Orleans-like cemeteries. There's even a ghost tour that walks around town showing such places.
Of the 26 rooms in the house, we were the only two rooms being rented that evening. SpaceRachel was waiting patiently on the front porch for us to get our fat asses in gear, sitting quietly on the side swing. Most of the house was completely dark and I'm sure it looked an awful lot like this picture from the ghost tour site. Thinking I was holding up the entire process, I moved quickly down the hallway and burst out onto the front porch in fully-lit-up, loud-obnoxious-Al mode. Burst.
|
September 2009
For the second straight day in Key West I hit the sack in mostly decent shape. I bade a fair thee well to my drunk-mates and went back to my zebra room. We made loose plans for breakfast in the morning, promises of french toast with Godiva white chocolate sauce. Passing out was almost instantaneous.
I still can't believe I didn't snap a picture of my room, it was huge, sporting faux zebra skin rugs, and a huge elongated mask type thing that stood at least 4 feet tall. Scary as shit flipping on the light in a drunken fog to see that thing jump out of the dark. You can kind of get a view of it in the pictures here from their website.
I was pulled out of my coma by the trusty cell phone chirping away at me once again, the now common occurrence. It was the SpaceFolk just letting me know they were off on another sightseeing adventures following their breakfast. A breakfast which I once again slept through. A breakfast that saw Jason chow down on the aforementioned french toast. Fucking booze ruins lives, or so I hear. Often. Another morning down the drains but I was up and moving.
While they ran around the island looking at butterflies and 6-toed cats I was spending my birthday getting a little bit of work done. It was a fine lazy afternoon looking forward to the evening. It was our final night in town for this trip and it was still my birthday. When you turn ancient they let you celebrate longer, not knowing how many more of these might come around. We were going to have dinner with my friend Nikki before she had to work and then some respectable drinking.
The decision was made, Bagatelles on Duval Street would be the ones to provide us with our last supper. Nikki and I naturally arrive early to camp out at the bar while the SpaceFolk finish touring the island. It took me all of 5 seconds to read the menu and make my selection. Something called "Honey Fried Lobster Tail" which both Nikki and bartender highly recommended. All the locals have given it a shot.
served with Honey Butter and Wasabi Mash
Lock it up.
I wish I could get a picture to properly show the goodness on the plate
More food piled upon more food with an extra helping of double desert on top. It made for a very fine afternoon sitting around with friends eating great food and casual meandering conversations. It seemed no time had passed before Nikki was begging off to make it to work on time and the remaining three of us slowly crawled back to our little guest house. Not even a professional drinker on his birthday would able to turn around from that feast and jump straight into real world hardcore drinking. A little down time was required.
Before we crawled our way back into the bars, I was able to have one of those moments that you just can't make up. I made a big impression on a large group of people through no other method than being my normal bull in a china shop self.
Our guest house was haunted. That is if you believe in such things or wish to amuse yourself into paying extra money for the mere chance of seeing a disembodied spirit. I was just happy to have a place literally stumbling distance from my favorite bars. Marrero's Guest
Of the 26 rooms in the house, we were the only two rooms being rented that evening. SpaceRachel was waiting patiently on the front porch for us to get our fat asses in gear, sitting quietly on the side swing. Most of the house was completely dark and I'm sure it looked an awful lot like this picture from the ghost tour site. Thinking I was holding up the entire process, I moved quickly down the hallway and burst out onto the front porch in fully-lit-up, loud-obnoxious-Al mode. Burst.
I'm sure I was quite an unexpected thing to see.
At that very moment one of the above mentioned tours just happened to be gathered around our front steps, each of the crowd facing away from the house to enjoy the tales of the tour guide in the top hat. The whole lot of them jumped out their skins and snapped around to see what the holy hell was happening. They all just stood there staring wide eyed at this abomination, like a god damned yeti just magically appeared in their presence full of tangled hair and Virginia's favorite tobacco.
It took 10 full minutes for me to explain this all to Spaceman after the fact, between the tears of laughter and remembering the look on the poor top hat guy. You just never know what you're going to see in Key West.
Tour Guide buyers beware.
At that very moment one of the above mentioned tours just happened to be gathered around our front steps, each of the crowd facing away from the house to enjoy the tales of the tour guide in the top hat. The whole lot of them jumped out their skins and snapped around to see what the holy hell was happening. They all just stood there staring wide eyed at this abomination, like a god damned yeti just magically appeared in their presence full of tangled hair and Virginia's favorite tobacco.
It took 10 full minutes for me to explain this all to Spaceman after the fact, between the tears of laughter and remembering the look on the poor top hat guy. You just never know what you're going to see in Key West.
Tour Guide buyers beware.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Back to Key West Part 3 (The Michael Jackson Incident)
Seems I have a new reader to the site. Mike g left a comment saying "More poker - less alcoholism!". Well hell son, this space has never been about that much poker, read the tag line. I'm a drunk with a poker problem. Even if I'm talking about poker I most likely am trying to run a casino out of free booze. We now return you to our previous alcoholic story already in progress.
~
Key West - Day 3
September 2009
I managed to get myself in bed nice and early Saturday night. I was forced to ignore the near constant messages from Nikki to get my ass down to the bar because she was bored. That's a dangerous combination for me, bored Nikki generally means I will get myself into all kinds of trouble. For some messed up reason I stayed true and avoided the bar. That night I managed to find the light switch and crash in relative darkness, something special for me.
There was no hiding out on Sunday though, it was the last day/night in town for the Gainesville Posse, we needed to get off our collective asses and turn in a fine drinking effort. There was no time to waste staring at the inside of my eyelids.
First order of business was "morning" mangia and we ended noshing on a nice little brunch that consisted of some fine bacon but also a public bathroom that involved (redacted) and (redacted) plus (redacted) that left Mrs. Spaceman rather out of sorts. I was disappointed I couldn't take them to my favorite spot called Panini Panini (Roast Beef, Muenster, Portobello, Green onion and Horseradish Sauce). Closed for the fall.
Afterwards the couples headed off for some island sightseeing while the 5th wheel, that would be me, made a beeline straight for the bar. It was Sunday afternoon and there were football games that weren't going to watch themselves. Many beers later (Yuengling Lager thank you very much) the boys showed up for their turn in front of the TVs. There is only so much hammock shopping any one man can take before surrendering to the call of booze and the NFL. Luckily for everyone involved I stayed away from the short shots and stuck mainly to beer flavored water.
The girls wanted to see the sunset.
I can't say I blame them, it's a nice way to kick off a night of drinking or continue a day of drinking. In all the times I've been on the island I've seen the sun come up a lot more then it going down. Priorities and all. They beat me to Sunset Pier to squat us a nice spot near the rail for the festivities. I arrived just in time to chug a few rum-soaked cocktails with the gang and the show was on. As captured via iPhone.
Pablo, Gracie, Jason and Rachel prepare for the sunset with tasty beverages
Still trying to figure out why I ever leave this place
Pirates!
Prepare to be boarded, aaarrrr
Isn't that all nice and pretty? It's never easy to pull yourself away from the the pier when it starts like this and everyone is getting nicely lubricated. SpaceRach was jamming along with the talent as they played somefunk R&B, we ate ourselves full of fresh seafood, Gracie was documenting it all via her iPhone technologies. But nothing lasts forever, no sense spending their last night in town at one place. Spontaneous pub crawling.
At Reloaded, drinks and shots.
At Irish Kevin's, drinks and shots and some pretty damned entertaining music. The SpaceFolk's first foray into one of the biggest bars on the island. We found ourselves a nice comfy spot at the end of the bar to keep the beers flowing and a good place to watch the crowd. There might have been some sing-a-longs here and there. Jason made friends with the Tennessee native on guitar and after we each dumped a fin in the tip bucket had our own private song request time.
At Teasers, the upscale strip club. No shots or beers. Or lapdances for that matter. We once again walked past the place of legend, the establishment that has taken more of my money than all the poker players combined and even a few well positioned girls of the past.
At Cowboy Bill's, we hit our pace. It was getting close to some mysterious time where I would magically jump forward another year in age. Even Madame Spaceman decided to knock back some shots. Why did no one ever tell me they have a vodka now that tastes exactly like Sweet Tea? I think Mrs. Spaceman's new favorite shot has gone from Soco Lime to chilled Sweet Tea vodka. There was a decent shot she would have finished off a bottle on her own if we hadn't left the bar.
Then Gracie, Pablo and Jason were also lifting shots once the clock ran past midnight along with just about everyone else at the bar. I like to conjugate my drinking. I drink, you drink, he drinks, she drinks, we all drink. Cheers. I soon found the past participle version of the word, "drunk".
"I'll do another shot with you IF we can go get pizza when we're done here" proclaimed Mrs. Spaceman. That would be a great way to end of the evening. Everyone would make it back to their haunted room in decent shape with a belly full of mostly edible pizza. But every good drinking night has a moment when things make that turn from ordinary to silly.
I am willing to spend a lot of my well earned money to keep The Spaceman from posting a certain video.
You see it was like this. The best pizza place open was further up Duval St away from our house. It was right next to one of the popular gay night clubs. I was wearing a shirt that said "Free Range Cock". I was drunk and Michael Jackson was coming out of the speakers. There might have been some dancing and Moon Walking. Did I mention I was drunk?
"No, my Blackberry doesn't take video. I'm just taking a picture" is how the Spaceman bluffed me on the river. I believed him and there now exists a video that I pray never makes it out on the webs. I make a living out of embarrassing myself and this one I knocked out of the park.
Yet another in a long string of birthdays that I'll never forget thanks to friends and their willingness to join me on insanity driven quests.
|
~
Key West - Day 3
September 2009
I managed to get myself in bed nice and early Saturday night. I was forced to ignore the near constant messages from Nikki to get my ass down to the bar because she was bored. That's a dangerous combination for me, bored Nikki generally means I will get myself into all kinds of trouble. For some messed up reason I stayed true and avoided the bar. That night I managed to find the light switch and crash in relative darkness, something special for me.
There was no hiding out on Sunday though, it was the last day/night in town for the Gainesville Posse, we needed to get off our collective asses and turn in a fine drinking effort. There was no time to waste staring at the inside of my eyelids.
First order of business was "morning" mangia and we ended noshing on a nice little brunch that consisted of some fine bacon but also a public bathroom that involved (redacted) and (redacted) plus (redacted) that left Mrs. Spaceman rather out of sorts. I was disappointed I couldn't take them to my favorite spot called Panini Panini (Roast Beef, Muenster, Portobello, Green onion and Horseradish Sauce). Closed for the fall.
Afterwards the couples headed off for some island sightseeing while the 5th wheel, that would be me, made a beeline straight for the bar. It was Sunday afternoon and there were football games that weren't going to watch themselves. Many beers later (Yuengling Lager thank you very much) the boys showed up for their turn in front of the TVs. There is only so much hammock shopping any one man can take before surrendering to the call of booze and the NFL. Luckily for everyone involved I stayed away from the short shots and stuck mainly to beer flavored water.
The girls wanted to see the sunset.
I can't say I blame them, it's a nice way to kick off a night of drinking or continue a day of drinking. In all the times I've been on the island I've seen the sun come up a lot more then it going down. Priorities and all. They beat me to Sunset Pier to squat us a nice spot near the rail for the festivities. I arrived just in time to chug a few rum-soaked cocktails with the gang and the show was on. As captured via iPhone.
Pablo, Gracie, Jason and Rachel prepare for the sunset with tasty beverages
Still trying to figure out why I ever leave this place
Pirates!
Prepare to be boarded, aaarrrr
Isn't that all nice and pretty? It's never easy to pull yourself away from the the pier when it starts like this and everyone is getting nicely lubricated. SpaceRach was jamming along with the talent as they played some
At Reloaded, drinks and shots.
At Irish Kevin's, drinks and shots and some pretty damned entertaining music. The SpaceFolk's first foray into one of the biggest bars on the island. We found ourselves a nice comfy spot at the end of the bar to keep the beers flowing and a good place to watch the crowd. There might have been some sing-a-longs here and there. Jason made friends with the Tennessee native on guitar and after we each dumped a fin in the tip bucket had our own private song request time.
At Teasers, the upscale strip club. No shots or beers. Or lapdances for that matter. We once again walked past the place of legend, the establishment that has taken more of my money than all the poker players combined and even a few well positioned girls of the past.
At Cowboy Bill's, we hit our pace. It was getting close to some mysterious time where I would magically jump forward another year in age. Even Madame Spaceman decided to knock back some shots. Why did no one ever tell me they have a vodka now that tastes exactly like Sweet Tea? I think Mrs. Spaceman's new favorite shot has gone from Soco Lime to chilled Sweet Tea vodka. There was a decent shot she would have finished off a bottle on her own if we hadn't left the bar.
Then Gracie, Pablo and Jason were also lifting shots once the clock ran past midnight along with just about everyone else at the bar. I like to conjugate my drinking. I drink, you drink, he drinks, she drinks, we all drink. Cheers. I soon found the past participle version of the word, "drunk".
"I'll do another shot with you IF we can go get pizza when we're done here" proclaimed Mrs. Spaceman. That would be a great way to end of the evening. Everyone would make it back to their haunted room in decent shape with a belly full of mostly edible pizza. But every good drinking night has a moment when things make that turn from ordinary to silly.
I am willing to spend a lot of my well earned money to keep The Spaceman from posting a certain video.
You see it was like this. The best pizza place open was further up Duval St away from our house. It was right next to one of the popular gay night clubs. I was wearing a shirt that said "Free Range Cock". I was drunk and Michael Jackson was coming out of the speakers. There might have been some dancing and Moon Walking. Did I mention I was drunk?
"No, my Blackberry doesn't take video. I'm just taking a picture" is how the Spaceman bluffed me on the river. I believed him and there now exists a video that I pray never makes it out on the webs. I make a living out of embarrassing myself and this one I knocked out of the park.
Yet another in a long string of birthdays that I'll never forget thanks to friends and their willingness to join me on insanity driven quests.
